Celebrity couples break up all the time. So why are South Africans so gutted by the news of Siya and Rachel Kolisi splitting?
Perhaps, the Springbok captain’s interracial marriage embodied the spirit of what it truly means to be part of a rainbow nation and it’s difficult to let go of that.
Or maybe his rags-to-riches story of perseverance, compellingly captured in the “Rise: The Siya Kolisi Story” documentary holds some of the answers. After all, his appointment as the first black captain of the South African Springboks in 2018 was a long-overdue victory in and of itself.
Siya’s story not only inspired the nation, it unified us. And now the glue that held South Africans together is coming undone with the breakup.
Is fame to blame here? After all, it does come at a price.
The couple tied the knot in 2016 after dating for four years. They have a beautiful family with a son, Nicholas Siyamthanda, born in 2015, and a daughter, Keziah, born in 2017.
In 2014, they adopted Siya’s half-siblings Liyema and Liphelo, when their mother died in 2009.
The joint statement that was released on Tuesday read: “We wanted to share some important news with you. After much reflection and open conversations, we have mutually decided to end our marriage.
“This decision comes from a place of love, respect, and understanding that this is the best path forward for both of us.
“While our relationship as a couple is changing, we remain great friends and committed partners in raising our children with the same love and care they’ve always known. We will also continue working together on the Foundation that means so much to us.
“We are grateful for the love, understanding, and support you’ve shown us, and we kindly ask for your respect as we navigate this transition.
“With gratitude and love, Siya and Rachel.”
Of course, netizens have been in their feels since. Some were calling for an intervention to help the couple reconcile while others wanted the real tea behind the announcement.
After all, no celebrity split is without scandal, right? Cough, Sonia and Matthew Booth and that cheesecake scandal that had us on the edge of our seats.
This was Tyler Perry’s “Acrimony” on steroids and the nation actively participated in the drama with social media commentary, Tupperware memes for days and … well, you get the picture.
Let’s not forget about the messy divorces like Somizi Mhlongo and Mohale Motaung, Lebo M and Pretty Samuels-Morake, Faith Nketsi and Nzuzo Nkuthalo Njilo, Black Coffee and Enhle Mbali, Letoya Makhene and Lebohang Keswa or Minnie Dlamini and Quinton Jones.
Not to pick on old wounds here but we can’t forget Joost van der Westhuizen and Amor Vittone’s scandalous divorce either.
However, Siya and Rachel’s breakup is to coin the trending catchphrase “very demure, very mindful”.
It kind of reminds me of the time when Gwyneth Paltrow announced her “conscious uncoupling” with Chris Martin when they split in 2014.
Sometimes we forget that the people we idolise are also human. They are not impervious to hurt, pain, egos or temptation. They are fallible beings.
Yes, the conspiracy theorists and gossip mongers are already in whodunit mode trying to figure out if there is someone else in the picture.
More so, after Rachel has called out thirsty women for sliding into her husband’s DMs in the past.
Being in the spotlight is accompanied by immeasurable pressure. The paparazzi always have a beady eye on your every moment - although in SA they are not as aggressive as their international counterparts.
Then there’s the lack of privacy, rumours and, in some instances, stalkers.
It’s not all sunshine and rainbows. Those red carpet moments are so picture-perfect that one often forgets that being in the public eye means that, irrespective of how you are feeling, you smile and pretend that everything is Nara Smith-perfect.
Meryll Frost once said: “Behind every successful man is a strong woman.”
The quote certainly rings true for Rachel and Siya. Their journey was not without a few bumps in the road.
The sports icon grew up in Zwide, a township on the outskirts of Gqeberha (previously Port Elizabeth) in the Eastern Cape.
Born on Youth Day in 1991, his mother was ill-equipped to raise a child and so the responsibility fell onto his grandmother, who raised him as a little boy.
In the documentary, he admitted that his resilience and a never-give-up attitude were born from the hardship of township life.
He said: “Didn’t have toys. Didn’t have money. Found a brick and used that as my car. The ‘Loxion’ is where I learned ubuntu.”
Ultimately, he had two choices, become a victim of circumstance or find a way out - and rugby became not just his salvation but his motivation.
Rachel also opened up about their relationship. She was commendably candid about Siya having a girlfriend when they met, her falling pregnant as well as the challenges they faced with his alcoholism after marriage.
While Rachel and Siya weathered plenty of storms together, it is sadly the end of the road for Mzansi’s favourite celebrity couple.
Although we will miss their quirky social media posts, especially with Rachel’s two left feet leaving us in hysterics, giving them the time and space needed to heal and move forward is perhaps the least the nation can do for them.
After all, they still have kids to co-parent and The Kolisi Foundation to run.
∎ The views expressed do not necessarily reflect the views of IOL or Independent Media.