Cape Town - Educational psychologist Nicola Buhr says parents should start now to have an open relationship and decent conversations with their children in preparing for year-end results.
This comes after the academic calender is drawing closer to year-end results and soon pupils will be preparing their final examination results, and this time of the year usually sees an increase in suicides and depression due to poor results.
Speaking to eNCA, Nicola Buhr, urged parents to be prepared and have a discussion with their children and they should not wait for the results to be released in order to give support and counselling.
“In South Africa approximately 9% of teenage death are due to suicide which is significantly high and approximately 20% of all high-school children have attempted suicide at some point. So the examinations is a risk factor because it is a time that can induce a significant amount of stress for Grade 12 matriculants.
“There are a few things that parents can do, I would say they really need to start with the open relationship and that can be started because their children will be expected to cope with the anxiety, and I don’t think parents want to counsel children with fear-based approach,’’ Buhr said.
She further said that parents should try and have constructive criticism so that if a child fails they can be able to sit them down instead of blaming them and find a way forward in terms of future plans that would make them to understand that suicide is not an option
“Suicide is something hopefully no one needs to consider and we do need to look at different factors to avoid it but start with having that open relationship so that they don’t feel like they are alone,” she said.
Buhr further maintained that in identifying the signs that a child might be enduring stress as result of failing is very important, and parents should look at the the change of their behaviour.
“Parents should look at them and ask, are they behaving in a way that is abnormal or are they struggling to sleep?, have they lost interest general activities, so before they might have wanted activities and suddenly they just stop and they are no longer interested in anything.
“Parents should also note if there are any appetite changes and sleep disturbances or feelings of hopelessness. Signs are not always visible but if parents create that open relationship they would have a courage to come to you as a parent asking for help,’’ she said.
She further pleaded with parents that if their children ask for help or showing indications of being suicidal they should take them to mental health practitioners, psychiatrists, or general medical practitioners.
“Not everyone is able to deal with failure but that doesn’t mean it is the end of the world and failure will never overtake one’s determination to succeed,” she added.
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